Cross Road

Last February 2013, I was officially transfered as sales agent. Now, after four long months' I have to face my first PEF. My superior gave me templates to answer, he said, I should evaluate myself first, then we'll discuss it this coming thursday. As I fill up my PEF, I started to realize that I literally failed. I started collecting memories of what happened the fast few months, and build scenariors that might happen in the future. I also ask friend if they have any ideas what my PEF turnabouts. I was give hints that I might get transfer in Reg. 2 again sa marketing. 

Well, anyway! I can fit in to any given situation' I just wont let them get away. I did my very best as sales agent, no matter how diffucult the task given.

Reading

Pag wala akong magawa at may net ang phone ko... nagbabasa ako ng blog ni dianethexplorer, miss universe at teachers pwet. makikita mo dun kung anung mood nila at kung anu pinagkakaabalahan nila' dun din ako kumukuha ng inspirasyon sa pagsusal...

Tapos ko mag basa, upload naman ng mga pics sa tumblr' Recent post ko ung book na binili ko sa pavillion sa laguna. The Book Thief ang title, tunglok sya sa isan batang babae na nakapulot ng pocket diary at yun ng sepulturero' dun nag simula ang kwento nya at nandun pa lang ako sa part na un' nyahahaha! regalo ko sa sarili ko... tapos habang nag babasa, bukas sa phone ko ung dictionary pra pag malalim ying ingles... makikita ko ung meaning para mas maintindihan ko. hehehe'

Lowest State

Nadating talaga sa buhay ng tao yung lowest state... ung tipong subsob na sa lupa... tapos maytatadyak pa sayo habang ni try mu tumayo...

grabe sobrang hirap... lasing na ko pero di ko parin makalimutan... tulog na ko pero tumatangis parin ako... gang wala na ung tama ng alak... nag susulat nako ng blog na to pero umaagos padin ung luha...

yung naka attach na picture' gawa ko yun... ni try ko mag wala... pero kontrol padin... habang nag wawala ako, sabi ko sa kanila' dyan lang kau sa loob! akin tong place for just one night, for this moment only... pero tagalog... jejeje! punong puno na kasi ako... kailangan ko lang mag labas ng konti' kaso parang di pa sapat ung nailabas ko kasi umaagos pa din luha ko ngaun... wala naman ako masabihan' nahihirapan na ako mag blog kasi puro luha mata ko... hahaha! bakla!? di naman...

"men were ment to fly with clouds between their knees.."

for what ever that means' im only a man...

Good Lord! please send me an angel right now... I know I been bad... pero please send me a refuge...

ang sama sama ng loob ko ngaun... di ko na alam kung matatagalan ko pa pa... di ko naman kayang mag pakamatay... masakit yun ee... God please help me...

Life in mono

Here we go again, another week in the field' Feels like my life goes in a routine. Looking forward to my TF tour. Its one of my year plan. Hope to see old buddies on that trip.

Raining

Its exactly 4:10pm when we arrive at Lucena. Its raining and some part of the hotel begins to fill up with water. Im not staying in this hotel' Im just waitng for someone.

Hope the weather gets better this next few days, coz we'll be conducting some brand activation. I will be difficult if the weather wont favor our side.

Cold Water'

It's ok to do what you want... they say... as long as it makes you happy!!! That's an effin sayings...
On the other hand' its hard p do thing that's against your will...
After reading all those messages, I thougt Im ok... yet not!!!
Effin people tells you thing like a walkin dictionary of life experience... Feed you shits assuming that all of peoples life are in pattern.
I pretend to be happy in front of people and act like a clown giving them smile in their faces hoping to take aways a little of their sadness... not knowing that everytime I do that, Their woes adds up to mine...
What the f^@< am I saying...

Putang ina!!! habang sinussulat ko tong blog na to... may dumaan matandang babae at hinawakan ang etuts ko sabay sigaw ng "weeee!!!"

Effin town this is' Im in a town where I first set foot only yesterday. Oh yeah! its holiday and Im working far away from the comfortof my home...
I miss my bed, badly! I'll be going hone tonight. I think I'll ve home at around 9 pm. Repack my bag, head tothe airport at around 3:00 am to catch the flight to Palawan.
Yeah! that's right... More work!!! with no time to fix my ass... and plenty of time to think, reflect and ask my self how stupid I am.
My life is a mess. Stapled and covered with colorful wallpapers to fix it and make it look nice.
I think I'll commit suicide... I'll hang my self tonight or maybe bleed my self to death... yeah right!
I have no one to talk to... or maybe I distrust everyone... I don't know! Im kinda lost...
Because of not having someone to talk to' I think Im kinda sick. When I alone doing nothing or something, taking a bath, or day dreaming. I curse my self, say bad work or scream with no sound. It just happen' Losing my self with liquor or entering vietual reality thru DOTA is the best escape.
I always wonder what will happen when I die!? will the world be a little less miserable!? All I know that my mother will be very sad'
I do have mistakes in life but I will never regret it. For what I am today are the result of my actions.
Thanks blogspot' your like a comfort room... giving comfort and not talking'

Bucket List for 2012

Before 2012 started... I created a list of things i want to accomplish within the year within my mind. Well it's the 3rd quarter of the year and theirs a lot of changes in my life. Some of the items in my list might be accomplish and some may not.

Some of the things I want to accomplish is to have a good abs at lease, but as of the moment. I can't manage my drinking and eating habit especially when Im in the field. I also assumed that I be gettin married by November but it will be imposible for the year but in exchange, i'll be having my first born by September (so excited!).

In the fourth quarter of the year. I'll be able to do my dream tour. It will be in Ilocos and Banawe. The first is in process while the other is not that sure yet.

Im writting this that to remind me what for me to expect till the end of the year and also to write my bucket list for 2013 on new year day.